Posted inGeneral / Purpose / Trust

“How to Trust the Process”

Is it me or are you too hearing “trust the process” so much more lately than usual?  I’m reading it in self-help materials, on social media, hearing it in webinars, television shows and in church services. Basically, everywhere.  Why is this catch phrase suddenly important and do you really get what trusting the process means or entails? 

Well, for some odd reason that question had been at the forefront of my mind for some time until one day, being in deep thought about it, blurted out to myself, “how does one trust the process if trusting is difficult or the process seems too complicated to get through?” 

What does it mean to trust?

Well, I think most would agree, you must first understand what trust is and how it does or doesn’t show up in your life.  According to, to trust means to rely on the character, ability, strength or truth of someone or something; place confidence in; to hope or expect; something committed or entrusted to one to be used or cared for in the interest of another. 

In other words, to trust involves being vulnerable, courageous, accepting, and hopeful.  Therefore, it’s not surprising to experience overwhelm, anxiety and/or doubt, which are all elements of fear, when there’s lack of trust in any area of your life.  It very much sounds like, to really trust in something or someone, you must have faith. 

“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see” Hebrews 11:1 (New International Version)

So, now you’re probably wondering what’s the difference between faith and trust because you may not be into the ‘faith’ thing, yet you feel you’re able to trust.  They’re both similar and often used interchangeably, but faith is impossible to separate from trust.  If you are trusting the process, you believe, rely on, and know with certainty that the actions or steps taken are intended to achieve the greater good.  Faith helps you to trust.

And I know this because…

Being an 18-year-old single mother starting college full-time and working part-time, became one of the most important seasons of my life to decide if I would trust the process or give in to doubts of succeeding, shameful judgment, financial hardships, mommy guilt, or other obstacles I wasn’t prepared to encounter physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. 

I’ll admit my faith wasn’t much of a priority back then, but the seed of it was planted from childhood and I wore hope like a badge of honor.  From the start, I trusted God would lead me through; yet there were days where the weight of it all was unbearable. The desire to quit was strong, even suggested at times, or choosing an easier option could have been more convenient.  Yes, there were other choices; however, riding it out, fighting the good fight, and trusting the process were the only options because somewhere deep within my young soul this was bigger than me.

Photo by Jeremy Bishop

A.H. Almaas posted an excerpt from his book Facets of Unity on his site that basic trust “… is an unspoken, implicit trust that what is optimal will happen, the sense that whatever happens will ultimately be fine. It is the confidence that reality is ultimately good; that nature, the universe, and all that exists are of their very nature good and trustworthy; that what happens is the best that can happen.” 

How to trust the process?

Hey, I get it.  Trusting everyone and everything is not the way to go.  However, to make it through challenges, stay motivated, and experience the best outcome of the process, you’ll have to solidify your ability to trust.  How?

  • Build your faith by believing in someone or something greater than yourself.  For me, it is God.  The all-knowing, all-powerful, everywhere present deity in my life.  God is not physically visible, yet, trusting His word and having experienced over and over again the goodness of believing it is more than satisfying.  Building your faith can be as simple as reading scripture, listening to sermons or speakers, meditating, speaking affirmations, etc.
  • Give energy only to the things in which you can control and be patient.  There are times where you have to surrender trying to control every step of the process and there are things you have to let go of or let be in order to move through the process intact and with a sound mind.  The ability to surrender or let go doesn’t mean things will fall apart.  It means that what’s happening in the moment is meant to happen, but you show up anyway ready and willing to grow, learn and/or exercise gratefulness for its purpose in your life.

When you try to control everything, you may rush through things, ignore some things (especially those which you don’t want to deal with), misplace some things, miss a lesson to be learned or ignore a much-needed break.  Be patient.  There’s purpose in the process.       

  • Accept failure as an option. WAIT! WHAT!  Okay, I know that sounds crazy.  But everything you think you need, want to do, or would like to happen is not always what is best for you at that time or maybe ever.  Sometimes we force things to happen that weren’t supposed to happen, creating an unexpected domino effect.  When things don’t work as we expect, take it as an opportunity to learn, grow, refocus and/or rebuild.

“Some of your greatest victories will come after your most painful experiences.  Be patient. Trust the process.”    

Author Unknown
  • Lastly, focus on what you’re learning/learned during the process and the value you bring to the table.  We all bring parts of our self to everything we encounter so why not your best self?  Your gifts and abilities were created within you to help lead you to a greater good.  Tap into them and find creative, out-of-the-box ways to use them.

To Conclude

We all want things to happen when we think they should happen, usually faster than our patience level is able to withstand.  Our impatience is why we give up so soon, lose hope, and blame others for the circumstance we’re in. Impatience is a symptom of mistrust. 

In the book Think, Act, Believe Like Jesus, Randy Frazee hit the nail on the head when he said, “the faster we want a life event to occur, the more it usually means we aren’t ready to handle the responsibility of it.”  Ouch!  That stung a little bit because who wants to admit they’re not ready?

Honestly, I was ready for college, but nowhere near ready to juggle mommy-hood and working at the same time.  Trusting that I would make it through my college years was one of the toughest tests of faith I had experienced up until then.  However, the more I stayed hopeful, focused on what I could control, learned from my mistakes, and ignored the naysayers, it all aligned for the ultimate good. 

There were students on campus who started a volunteer babysitting service so other mothers like me were able to attend class.  Grants and scholarships were awarded to me for 3 ½ years of the 4 years.  There was a support system who rallied around and walked alongside me when taking another step forward got too hard.  At the end of each semester, I was more confident and felt more worthy of who I was created to be. I made it through, intact and empowered! I trusted the process.  You can too!

Listen, trusting the process is no easy feat in many situations, but so worth it.  If you are in the middle of something and it gets difficult and you’re ready to quit; or you’re not seeing progress fast enough and you think you can make it happen sooner; or, continually beating yourself up about mistakes, you are not trusting the process.

Be patient.  Build your faith.  Use mistakes as a learning tool and have confidence in the value of your natural gifts.  You were created for a reason and in every process the reason becomes increasingly clear. 

What have you learned from trusting the process when you came through on the other side?

“But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31

College graduation with my son, Richard. We did it!